Your smile is like breathe a spring
Your voice is soft like summer rain
I cannot compete with you, Jolene.
I found the evidence of Jolene and I was forced to swallow my words. With explanations so vivid they can only truly exist in a perfect fairy tale. In the world of reality, however, one can take two paths in my position: Veronica's or Alice's. Pandora's box quenched my thirst of curiosity at the mercy of a heartbreak that not even cheesecake can mend. Now, as I sit in my chamber of misery, forcing the strength to fabricate a smile, I cannot help but dance around these unanswered questions. The acceptance of these answers rip apart my rib cage all the while I seem to be more than willing to take the blame for it all. Silly and foolishly assuming to take the place of number one is only rationally accepted in his bed, as I lay there hoping I've done enough. Hoping Jolene's scent will be scalded off of him. Hoping I can recover what I, myself, incautiously pushed away. I have to bare the coldness afterwards while he is out.
You can have your choice of men
But I can never love again
He's the only one for me, Jolene.
I had to have this talk with you
My happiness depends on you
And whatever you decide to do, Jolene.
As I sit here waiting like a dog for its master to arrive home, I can only pray my name was the only center of serenity he felt. Constantly & willingly I leave my heart in his hands and he unknowingly juggles it right before my eyes. I can suddenly envision my heart flirting with death once again. I know when he walks through that door, leaving behind the day's work, I will instinctively want to throw my arms around his tired neck, shoulders, and back. I also know he will take a moment to push me away to get settled. This feeling, like a slap in the face, will remind me he greeted me differently when I was Little Loltia - when I was someone else. Then once again, as if I promised, I will try over and over... again and again. All the worries will be halted once I can feel his arms around my back and his cold lips and cool breath on my neck. Suddenly, I become his - his lapdog, his property, only his. And I will beg for his love or abuse as long as it makes him smile because only when he smiles do I feel his love.
Jolene, I'm begging of you please don't take him.
Your voice is soft like summer rain
I cannot compete with you, Jolene.
I found the evidence of Jolene and I was forced to swallow my words. With explanations so vivid they can only truly exist in a perfect fairy tale. In the world of reality, however, one can take two paths in my position: Veronica's or Alice's. Pandora's box quenched my thirst of curiosity at the mercy of a heartbreak that not even cheesecake can mend. Now, as I sit in my chamber of misery, forcing the strength to fabricate a smile, I cannot help but dance around these unanswered questions. The acceptance of these answers rip apart my rib cage all the while I seem to be more than willing to take the blame for it all. Silly and foolishly assuming to take the place of number one is only rationally accepted in his bed, as I lay there hoping I've done enough. Hoping Jolene's scent will be scalded off of him. Hoping I can recover what I, myself, incautiously pushed away. I have to bare the coldness afterwards while he is out.
You can have your choice of men
But I can never love again
He's the only one for me, Jolene.
I had to have this talk with you
My happiness depends on you
And whatever you decide to do, Jolene.
As I sit here waiting like a dog for its master to arrive home, I can only pray my name was the only center of serenity he felt. Constantly & willingly I leave my heart in his hands and he unknowingly juggles it right before my eyes. I can suddenly envision my heart flirting with death once again. I know when he walks through that door, leaving behind the day's work, I will instinctively want to throw my arms around his tired neck, shoulders, and back. I also know he will take a moment to push me away to get settled. This feeling, like a slap in the face, will remind me he greeted me differently when I was Little Loltia - when I was someone else. Then once again, as if I promised, I will try over and over... again and again. All the worries will be halted once I can feel his arms around my back and his cold lips and cool breath on my neck. Suddenly, I become his - his lapdog, his property, only his. And I will beg for his love or abuse as long as it makes him smile because only when he smiles do I feel his love.
Jolene, I'm begging of you please don't take him.
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